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One day I will, you know. I'll totally surprise you.
You'll be in the kitchen, making that thing you always make, with the kale and the locally wild-crafted mushrooms. And I'll totally burst in and be like, "I did it. I quit my job. I bought a motorcycle. I'm moving to Barbados and shaving off all my hair."
And you'll be all like devastated and stuff. You'll say, "What will I do with all this whatever with the expensive mushrooms?"
Then you'll be like, "But your parents are coming for Christmas."
Then we'll both cry for the first time in forever and you'll totally rethink your life. You'll say,
"Thirty-nine is way too old to be working in a record store. I've had an epiphany, I have. I'm going to run away too."
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